How does one become a redneck? For most rednecks the answer is easy; they where born to redneck parents and grew up as rednecks. But somewhere, back in time, there where no rednecks—where did the first one come? Was a child born a redneck with normal parents or did the parents become rednecks and then give birth? The chicken or the egg?

I am asking because of one of my little sisters—she is a redneck. She was not always a redneck, but in the past two or three years she has become more and more a redneck. She wares greasy wife beaters, obsesses over supe’d up cars, talks like she lives in a Tennessee trailer park she flunked out of her first semester of community college because she never went to class (she is actually quite intelligent—she’s just really lazy, and the lazy part overpowers the smart part most of the time,) and is obsessed with a 15 year old high school dropout redneck boy who talks about her like shit behind her back. Someone should just giver her a pair of slippers and the keys to a trailer.

I don’t understand it, my parents are both college educated people, who work in science, my older sister and I both have degrees, my youngest sister is a strait A student and yet the other is still a redneck? Now I hung out with some rednecks in my life—they are really nice people, don’t get me wrong, but let’s face it most of them are stuck in life. They will never be anything but a redneck, and most rednecks are poor, disgusting, wretched creatures who live in trailers and go hunt’n or ride 4×4’s thru the woods while drunk off their asses and then don’t understand it when someone gets hurt. Would you want your sister to grow up to be a foul mouthed redneck bitch?

Anyway, maybe their is a glimmer of hope that my sister can pull herself up out of the red hole she is in. I talked with her the other night and she said she had decided she wanted to go to school to learn how to put electronics together. I told her that the people who put things together most of the time did not go to college, they were just blue collar laborers. What she was actually talking about was a computer or electrical engineer—the people who design the systems. (I don’t know if that is what she was talking about, but at least it requires a college degree!) So she said she was going to look into going back to the community college and working hard to get A’s so she could transfer to a school for engineering. Now we’ll see if this is a true turn around or just a flavor of the week…